The Municipal Coo — March 17, 2026

Around the District

Sycamore Lane Flower Arrangement Sparks Speculation

Sycamore Lane · District Desk

A flower arrangement on the south-facing ledge at 16 Sycamore Lane has been changed for the fourth consecutive month, drawing comment from residents who had previously considered the ledge decorative but not strategic.

The resident responsible, who is known to most of the street and has asked not to be named, confirmed the arrangement is seasonal and "not for anyone in particular." She added that dried lavender was chosen for its calming properties, not because it is visible from two branches and a parking structure.

Three neighbors described the arrangement as "very noticeable." A fourth described it as "pointed." The resident has declined further comment but has since added rosemary.

Court Notices

Avian Municipal Nest Court — Branch Division

Status Update — AMNC-2025-022C

Starling v. Starling. Egg custody. Case closed. Final order entered. Custody arrangement approved as submitted: alternating weekends, shared Wednesday evenings, and one floating holiday to be agreed upon annually. The Court reminds both parties that "floating" refers to the schedule, not the method of transport.

Clerk: T. Nuthatch.

Classified

FOR SALE: One (1) spice rack, wall-mounted

Cedar. Eight compartments. Previously organized alphabetically by someone who is no longer in the household. Current owner does not cook but has retained the rack on principle. Some compartments are empty. Others contain spices purchased in 2022 that may or may not still be active. The oregano smells like a decision made too late.

Asking: reasonable. Will accept sympathy.

Box 022, c/o this publication.

Personal

FEMALE, FINCH, 34

Recently out of a thing. Not looking for another thing. Looking for someone who can sit on a branch without narrating what they see. Strong opinions are fine if they stay inside. Must not describe previous relationships as "learning experiences" in the first conversation. I have been learned from enough.

Evenings only. No owls.

Reply to: Box 34-F.

Karen Hawk

Attorney at Law · Rapid Descents · Clean Separations

Specializing in contested nest divisions, emergency no-perch orders, and situations where he says it was "just drinks." Eighteen years of family law experience. Exposed to every version of "it's not what it looks like." Still not impressed.

"She got me the branch, the eggs, and an apology I could use in future proceedings." — former client

Free consultation · Evening and weekend appointments

I do not do couples counseling. That ship has sailed, sunk, and been entered into evidence.

Letters

Letters to the Editor

Letters may be edited for length and clarity. Views expressed are the author's.

Dear Editor,

I would like to address the bird at the south end of the park who has begun singing at 4:45 AM. I am not opposed to singing. I am opposed to singing that sounds like it was written during a custody hearing and performed for an audience of one ex-wife who lives three trees over and has asked, publicly, for it to stop.

If this is therapy, do it indoors. If this is a performance, sell tickets. If this is grief, I am sorry, but it is also 4:45.

— R. Nuthatch, Municipal Oak (no relation to the Clerk)